When someone discloses to you that they have been sexually assaulted, it is important to provide a positive social reaction to prevent causing any further trauma.

Say This: Not This:
I am so sorry this happened to you. You should be over this by now.
Thank you for telling me. I don’t believe you.
It took a lot of courage to share this with me. Prove it.
This must be really tough for you. Why don’t you remember everything that happened?
It is not your fault. What were you wearing?
You did not do anything to deserve this. Why didn’t you say no?
You are not alone. You really need to report this to the police.
I care about you. You really need counseling.
I am here to listen or help in anyway that I can. Why did you or didn’t you (invite him over so late, fight back, call the police, etc.)?