By: Ashton Newton Entertainment Editor
Campus clowns are nothing to be afraid of. Here are some tips to help you get through the epidemic:
1. Clowns are more afraid of you than you are of them.
2. There’s a small chance that the clowns are friendly and just want to entertain you.
3. Clowns usually have big shoes, so you can run faster than them.
4. Clowns can smell fear so just try to smile and sing, “Let it Go” if you see one.
5. If you see a clown exit a vehicle, just remember that there could be an infinite amount of clowns remaining in the vehicle and plan your route accordingly.
6. A clown’s true weakness is sadness, playing “Angel” by Sarah McLachlan while showing pictures of sad puppies should scare the clown off.
7. If it comes down to self-defense, a pie in the face will do more damage than any weapon could do.
8. Clowns only follow people because they want to cheer them up, so when running from a clown, laugh maniacally.
9. If there are clown sightings in your area, avoid walking through forests alone at night.
10. Hostility toward clowns creates hostile clowns. Follow the tips above so hopefully one day we can have peace between the clowns and us.
sky, and not all constellations are zodiac symbols. When Babylonians were creating the zodiac calendar, they decided to pick 12 of the constellations that the sun passed through to represent the 12 different parts of the zodiac. Ophiuchus was always there, the Babylonians just didn’t want it in their calendar. As NASA pointed out on their Tumblr page: they’re in the business of studying astronomy, not astrology. So, take a deep breath, you don’t have to update your Tinder bio just yet.
Why not six? Nobody ever said you were an overachiever.
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