Humor

The signs go home for Thanksgiving: Aries: All I need are my cats and a mega-pint of wine Taurus: If I hear one more comment about my “holey” jeans I’m going to stuff myself into the turkey Gemini: STUFFING IS DISGUSTING… and no one can change my mind Cancer:...

Aries: buying half price candy and advil at the drugstore Taurus: saw the opportunity to run away last night and hasn’t been seen since Gemini: already making a Pinterest board for next year’s fit Cancer: still sleeping on the lawn after trying to connect with their...

Here’s what the signs are doing for the spooky season: Aries: Taking out their anger with a pumpkin and carving tools.  Taurus: Why would I walk around to get candy when I could just doordash it? At home, in bed.  Gemini: having more fun getting ready for...

Aries: Screaming into the crusty dorm carpet during their “floor time” Taurus: Hating group projects, talking to people, listening to people, interacting with people… people. Gemini: Being asked to put your phone away in class won’t stop your eight hours of daily...