Clarity comes only after confusion, I am certain. When one is away from a normal routine the mind is free or rather forced to explore new possibilities and options. Potential for floundering and discontentment but also clarity is awakened with this new horizon of opportunities. This marks my 4th Wednesday in Cape Town and I am now experiencing some much needed clarity. Of course this “clarity” formed only after some pretty major mind freak out (of which I am sure will manifest themselves again before I am safely on my dying bed -all secrets of the universe known and meaning of life in the bag) but for now those freak outs are mute.
There was a point last week that I felt very defeated. My phone was stolen, I couldn’t figure out the technology at work, and I ordered a chocolate milkshake after vowing them off. My mind started down the slippery slope of comparison. I mind stalked dozens of people who already have a Wikipedia page, 100, 0000 hits on YouTube, those who have excelled in their craft and stand as the best or are in the pursuit of a goal they know they can attain with the right amount of dedication and people who run ultra marathons for kicks and giggles. I got this chip on my shoulder that I wasn’t Justin Bieber, Anderson Cooper, or Michelle Obama.
Because of this distraction, I almost forgot I was participating in my dream internship in one of the most exotic and stimulating countries in the world. Already I have published a half dozen articles on our online magazine, researched countless topics ranging from new inventions to classic art, interviewed Oscar nominated directors and now in the process of shooting a documentary and writing a script based on the Kwaito dance/music movement. In other news I can navigate public transportation like a boss and just got my scuba diving license! My social network has grown, my mouytai martial arts moves developed, eating habits improved, hiking skills perfected and cultural awareness ballooned. Last week I went to a J&B horse race that was a flurry of colours and a feast for the eyes (all the who’s who people were there in extravagance)then to Mzoli’s meat market that was incredible. Mzoli is one of the most successful business men in the townships and has created a dance and braai(bbq) feast for tourists and locals alike. I have so many plans for the next few weeks (wine tour, holi festival, rugby game, robins island, museums, the beach, shark cage diving….) I just wish I had a few more life times here!
When things go wrong (stolen phone etc.) it’s easy to fall in a dark space and forget momentarily why you are where you are. I admire how you always bring yourself back to “clarity after confusion.” You have accomplished so much already during your time in South Africa and more will continue to unfold. Michele