This week in completely made up horoscope

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[fruitful_tab title=”Aries 3/21-4/19″] Wake up 3 minutes before Zoom class. No exceptions. [/fruitful_tab]

[fruitful_tab title=”Taurus 4/20-5/20″] I’m zooming out…bye [/fruitful_tab]

[fruitful_tab title=”Gemini 5/21-6/20″] Just like how professors knew you were texting in class, professors know you’re playing Animal Crossing on your switch during Zoom. [/fruitful_tab]

[fruitful_tab title=”Cancer 6/21-7/22″] I wish my Zoom meeting would get hacked by someone interesting … like Jeff Goldblum and his astounding lesbian energy. [/fruitful_tab]

[fruitful_tab title=”Leo 7/23-8/22″] lol [/fruitful_tab]

[fruitful_tab title=”Virgo 8/23-9/22″] What Sag said…Good luck. [/fruitful_tab]

[fruitful_tab title=”Libra 9/23-10/22″] zoooooooooooooooooooOOOOOooOOOO00O000ooonm

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[fruitful_tab title=”Scorpio 10/23-11/21″] It’s okay to wear no pants when you’re Zooming, they can’t see much anyways. Be comfortable in these uncomfortable times. [/fruitful_tab]

[fruitful_tab title=”Sagittarius 11/22-12/21″] I have no zoom meetings this term, so idk what to tell y’all. Good luck? lmao. [/fruitful_tab]

[fruitful_tab title=”Capricorn 12/22-1/19″] Pro tip: make yourself look sad during your Zoom meeting so the professor won’t call on you. [/fruitful_tab]

[fruitful_tab title=”Aquarius 1/20-2/18″] You think Zoom is only for class? Amateur. I use it to hold my daily sob sessions with my cry guys. [/fruitful_tab]

[fruitful_tab title=”Pisces 2/19-3/20″] Zoom? Zoom who? The only “Zoom” I know is the PBS series I used to watch as a kid. Best part of my day. [/fruitful_tab]

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