Mount Hood

Navigating conflict for successful relationships

Caity Healy | Lifestyle Editor

While there has never been a time in my life where I’ve found it enjoyable to get into an argument with a significant other, I have noticed a pattern — I either leave the conflict feeling absolutely horrible, or I leave with a feeling of relief and optimism. Obviously, I prefer the latter. As much as I hate conflict with the person I love, it’s important to note that healthy and fair disputes are a necessary component to a flourishing relationship.

Healthy, fair fights can lead to many benefits that you wouldn’t necessarily realize. The fact is that all couples argue. It’s unavoidable to spend so much time with someone and not find yourself bickering over something. However, successful couples disagree differently.

According to Dr. Aislinn Addington, director of Abby’s House, a healthy argument means “listening to each other and respecting each others needs. If at the end, you both move forward, then that is great.”

Some other tips to keep your disagreements healthy include not running from an argument. If something is bothering you, and you know it will continue to bother you, it needs to be said. While it may be difficult and probably uncomfortable, it’s necessary that both partners are included and in the loop when it comes to important topics. Speak your mind.

Remember that you are a team. You are in your relationship together, and keeping that thought in the back of your head during an argument can help you remember that you chose to be with this person for a reason. Don’t let a dispute keep you from seeing that.

The benefits to a clean, healthy argument are more extensive than you’d think. Opening up to each other can create a sense of trust. Letting a partner know that you trust them enough to let them see your true feelings will ultimately make them feel more included and accepted. Also, holding things in will cause damage to your relationship. Talking about things early on will stop it from piling on and weighing even heavier on your shoulders.

Healthy conflict is a way for you to grow as a couple. Look at a fair dispute as an opportunity to progress together and become intimate in a way you hadn’t been before. With all this being said, while a healthy fight is incredibly beneficial, it’s important to know the difference between a fair fight and an unhealthy one.

“Look for patterns. If you’re clear with your needs and your partner chooses to disregard that, that’s unhealthy,” Dr. Addington commented. “Having the same fight over and over again, or if it escalates is something to watch out for.” Fighting just to fight versus fighting for the sake of a resolution is another thing to look for. If you feel like you aren’t being heard and are simply talking to no one, this is a bad sign and an indicator of an unhealthy relationship.

Any fight that turns personal, where your partner begins making jabs at you as a person rather than something you did to hurt them, is unhealthy. “Sometimes it starts with put-downs and name calling,” Addington added, “and it generally becomes something worse over time.” Watch out for this, and make sure you aren’t doing it yourself.

And lastly, of course, any type of abusive argument or fight is incredibly dangerous and a huge red flag. Do not take this lightly. Whether it be physical, emotional, verbal or mental, it is never okay. If you find yourself in a situation like this, know that there are people you can talk to. Abby’s House in the Werner University Center offers services for people experiencing domestic and dating violence. You can also call the National Domestic Abuse Hotline at 1-800-799-3224.

Contact the author at chealy16@wou.edu

Photo by: Caity Healy

Traveling on a budget

Caity Healy | Lifestyle Editor

It may only be week three, but with all the rain in the forecast, the only thing my mind can go to is spring break. While it still is a while away, now is the best time to start planning your trips.

You may be thinking that as a college student, on a college student budget, there is no way you can afford to travel anywhere. However, with some proper planning and research, it’s actually a lot cheaper than you’d think. Here are some tips on how to prepare yourself for a trip that won’t break the bank.

 

  1. Start planning ahead of time

The best time to plan when prices are usually the lowest is about three months before you’re trying to travel. So if you’re planning a trip for spring break, now is the time to do it.

  1. Utilize apps such as Kayak

They help you search for flights to and from wherever you’re trying to go, and it also will denote certain days that have better deals. For instance, it’ll tell you whether you should purchase your tickets then or wait. You can also look at Google Flights, which will give you the price for every single day for any destination at the best price.

  1. Use social media

Follow accounts on Twitter such as @airfarewatchdog and @theflightdeal, as they will tweet when there is glitches or good deals regularly.

  1. Break your trip down into shorter legs

Rather than flying straight from home to your destination, you may find it cheaper to make stops and connect from one airport to the next. It’s important to do your research and check all of your options.

  1. Think about where you are staying

There are a lot of cheaper ways to lodge than staying in a hotel. Airbnb offers international stay for a lot less, and often will have full kitchens so you can even cook for yourself instead of eating out every night- which obviously will get expensive. You can also look into hostels if you are open to a shared space with others.
6. Pick the right destination

When planning your trip, think about where might be a cheaper place to go. The location will play a huge part in the price. You can still fly internationally and do so on a budget, but some places are far more expensive than others.

  1. Pack light

Bringing that extra suitcase will cost you more than you’d think. Save yourself the hassle of bringing a checked bag, and just bring the necessities.

  1. When you’re there, live cheap

Do things that cost you very little or nothing at all, and try to limit how much money you’re spending on different activities. Rather, go for a walk around the city, a hike, a walk on the beach or listen to some live street music. There are ways to enjoy your time traveling at very little cost.

 

Contact the author at chealy16@wou.edu

Mixing it up with protein shakes

Caity Healy | Lifestyle Editor

Protein is an incredibly vital component to any healthy and balanced diet. Your body uses it to build and repair tissue, and it’s an important building block in your muscle, blood, skin and more. Unlike many other nutrients, our body has no protein stores that it can go to when you need it. For that reason, you need to supplement this through your choice of foods.

A really convenient and useful product to help get your levels where they need to be is protein powder. However, if you’re similar to many, you have trouble finding any protein that doesn’t taste and smell absolutely awful. Through trial and error — and more error — and eventually success, I’ve been able to find some recipes that actually make protein enjoyable — mostly due to the fact that all the other ingredients overpower the taste. So, if you’re looking to get that boost of protein to your diet, try out some of these recipes that will have you questioning if there’s really any of the supplement actually in it.

Total protein count for each recipe may vary depending on brands used.

 

Mixed Berry Smoothie:

-Combine one-half cup of frozen mixed berries (I like using strawberries, blackberries, raspberries, and blueberries) with one-fourth cup of vanilla greek yogurt, one-fourth cup of orange juice, and 1 scoop of vanilla protein. Blend until well mixed. If you need more liquid to reach desired viscosity, add water.

Total Protein: 22 Grams

 

Peanut Butter Chocolate Smoothie:

-Combine 1 cup of sweetened almond milk with 2 tablespoons of natural peanut butter, 1 scoop of chocolate protein, 1 teaspoon of honey and 1 frozen banana cut into small pieces. Blend together, and if you want it thicker, add more ice. If you would like, add a teaspoon of dark chocolate syrup.

Total Protein: 34 Grams

 

Orange Cream Smoothie:

-Combine one-half cup of vanilla ice cream (for highest protein, opt for brands like Halo Top), one-fourth cup sweetened almond milk, one-half cup orange juice, 1 scoop vanilla protein, one-half teaspoon vanilla extract. Blend, and add ice if it needs to be thickened.

Total Protein: 22.5 Grams

 

Contact the author at chealy16@wou.edu

Photo by: Caity Healy

Confront your consumption

Paul F. Davis | Photo Editor

Most people in the United States know that our shared over-consumption of the Earth’s resources is fundamentally changing our air and ecosystems. It’s hard sometimes to not feel downtrodden about our failure to be stewards of the Earth, but don’t feel down; you can make a difference through changing a few habits and being aware of the things you are using. Together we can make a drastic difference in the Earth’s future just by eliminating our use of a few consumables.

If you haven’t heard, there has been an uproar on social media about our use of straws — believe the hype. Straws are one of the many wasteful and unnecessary things our culture prides itself on consuming. When going out to a coffee shop or eating at a restaurant, just get in the habit of saying, “Thank you, I don’t need a straw” or bring your own reusablez one.

But straws are not the only wasteful thing we consume, they are only the tip of the metaphorical iceberg. While eating or drinking ask yourself, “do I really need that?” Because how often do you really use those plastic utensils, napkins or bags after you’re done giving into your human needs?  Change your habits, change the world.

Another unnecessary consumable that our culture loves to use are tubes in the middle of our rolls of toilet paper? The tubes make it easier for the paper to turn around the pole in the center. This use of tubes, however, isn’t even necessary. Toilet paper still works to the last sheet without a tube in the center and they sell it for a lower price as well. So college students, go out to the store, Waremart or Roths, and buy some tubeless and more affordable toilet paper.

Ever stop to think where all your night-out glitter goes after your evening of debauchery? It often enters our waterways. Those microplastics, any plastic smaller than a fifth of an inch, are one of the worst things for waterways. These microplastics take one of two paths when they enter a river or where ever our waste water enters. This glitter is either mistaken as food by our aquatic friends, any river dwelling animal, or as the microplastic lands on river beds where it slowly leaches out chemicals that are not advantageous for any living creature and sometimes even carcinogenic. So once again, ask yourself, do you really need to use that glitter?

Together let’s change our habits and start to ask do we really need this or that, and apply that thought process to everything we use. When we develop this skill, we will use less. When we use less, we have all made a decision to work towards the betterment of our Earth’s future.

Contact the author at pfdavis14@wou.edu

Photo by: Tiia Monto

 

What does anxiety look like to you?

Paul F. Davis

Mikaela Wong | Freelancer

I had my first panic attack when I was 8-years-old. I wasn’t able to understand the reality of what it was until I was 19 and started getting them more regularly. The feeling was always familiar: my chest got tight, my throat closed up, my eyes widened and my breathing started getting quicker and shorter. I felt as if I was drowning; I had no control.
To me, anxiety is the constant feeling of being on-edge or fidgety that never goes away, but just varies in levels and extremeness. It can sometimes get the better of me when I’m overwhelmed by responsibilities, if I’m surrounded by too many people and become socially exhausted or sometimes for no apparent reason at all.
In my specific case, my problem is that I have a high-functioning personality, meaning that I am very good at hiding my problems and feelings. Instead, I use it to fuel my motivation to accomplish or achieve things. Not that I believe that accomplishing things is bad, but using it to distract or deviate my mind and others’ from what is bothering me can be. It reached a point where I was achieving so much and had everything that I thought I would need in order to be happy, yet I still asked myself why I felt empty inside.

While there are many ways in which people choose to deal with their mental disorders, I chose to start seeing a therapist when I noticed the behavioral patterns heading in a negative direction.
I was diagnosed with major depression and extreme anxiety. My therapist told me that achievement was a common way of coping with deeper issues, as if my self-worth was dependent on how much I could get done. But that in reality, I just needed to be and exist without needing to prove myself to anyone, including myself.
In order to do that, I had to practice being “mindful”. This meant teaching myself to be in the moment and forcing myself to observe things I directly saw instead of worrying about what it meant, or letting my mind wander into the hypothetical world or over-analyzation it tended to go to whenever my anxiety would rise. “What if I didn’t study enough for that test? What if my friends are just pretending to like me? What if my life doesn’t look like how I want it to in 10 years?”

Instead, when presented with a situation where I felt my anxiety sneaking up on me, I focus on my body and observe which parts of me are feeling tight and rigid. Then as I slowly and consciously relax that muscle, I visualize the stress leaving my body and become more aware of my posture and position. I will take five minutes to ground myself and become aware of my breathing while observing colors, shapes and textures, before continuing to proceed with my day.
Mental disorders and self-care are going to be different and look different to everyone. Asking for help isn’t a weakness and finding out how to take care of yourself isn’t a waste of time. Life is a process for you, not a presentation for others. If you or someone you know is struggling, help is available. You can visit the Student Health and Counseling Center for a confidential appointment, free to any student registered with six or more credit hours.

Meal-prepping made easy

Caity Healy

Caity Healy | Lifestyle Editor

A new and increasingly more common trend amongst many, especially those who are health-conscious or ones on a budget, is food prepping. Cooking the meals that you will eat throughout the week and storing them in containers offers a simple way to keep you prepared, and can lead to more discipline in what you choose to eat if you’re focusing on your health.

The problem that many people can run into when eating healthy is that it’s not cheap. Purchasing fresh produce and high-protein meals can tend to get expensive. This is especially true when you purchase more than you can actually use, and it goes bad before you even have the chance to use it. However, with some proper meal planning, this can be easily avoided.

Before shopping, know what you want your meals to be. To do that, try to think of what meals would most closely reflect the diet that you’re trying to consume. Make sure that whatever you choose is of the right amount of calories, protein, carbohydrates, fat and whatever other nutrients you’re trying to reach. Once you map out your meals for the allotted time that you’re prepping for, you can compile a grocery list that you’ll stick to once you head to the store.

While shopping, it’s a good idea to buy things in bulk, as you’ll typically use most of it while prepping everything and it’ll offer you the cheapest option. For example, if you’re planning for chicken breasts to be part of your prep, your best bet would be to purchase a bag of frozen chicken breasts as it costs far less than unfrozen and can go further.

Another thing to think about when shopping is if you’re trying to stick to a budget, are there cheaper things that you can replace items with? Certain meats are equally as high in protein but cost far less; some vegetables last longer and therefore will be cheaper in the long run as you won’t have to throw anything out.

When cooking, cook all of one item at a time. Cook any meats together all at once, all vegetables together and so on. Then, once everything is done, you can separate everything you’ve cooked based on how long you’re prepping for. Be reasonable; only prep for the days where you know you won’t be cooking.

When everything is all prepped and put into containers, you’re ready to go. Just make sure that you don’t prep things too far ahead of time. For instance, cooked chicken only lasts about four days in the fridge. Make sure that what you’re choosing to cook will stay fresh.

 

Contact the author at chealy16@wou.eduIMG_3729

Small ways to make side cash

Paul F. Davis

Caity Healy | Lifestyle Editor

Here’s a fact that many of us know far too well: college is not cheap. For many, the stress of being a full-time student can be far too heavy to even consider finding a side job. And for those who have a job as well as being a student, sometimes you still don’t feel like you have enough money in the bank to live comfortably.

Luckily, being a college student allows for some opportunities to make money that are fairly low commitment. While nothing can come incredibly easy, there are ways that you can still make some cash without the stress of working hours every week. Choosing to take up any of these options allows you to focus on being a student first and lets you leave some of your financial stress behind.

 

-Be a note-taker in your classes, if applicable. You’ll already be there; doing this forces you to really pay attention to the lectures and jot things down. Not only will you be making money, but you’ll do better in school. You can apply in the Office of Disabilities.

-Sell things online. I’m not saying to sell everything you own, but think about what you have that you never use. Or, you could even buy things second-hand and resell it for profit.

-Tutor. Are you really good at your major? You can make money by helping others reach the skill level you are at. For more information and to apply, contact the Student Success and Advising Office.

-Babysit/petsit. Living in a college town, it can be hard to remember that we do live in a city where many families live. Many parents would love to hire a trustworthy and qualified college student versus an unqualified high school student.

-Freelance writing. Here at the paper, we would love to have talented writers share their voice; for more information feel free to contact me or any staff member.

-Use your talents. Can you knit? Sew? Paint? Are you good at making signs? People will pay for handmade, quality products. Start small by selling to people you know, and eventually you could branch out to different customers.

 

Contact the author at chealy16@wou.edu

Dining out of town for date-night

Caity Healy

Caity Healy | Lifestyle Editor

While Monmouth offers several delicious quick-bites, if you’re looking to go somewhere a little fancier, your options are limited. I knew that I wanted to take my boyfriend out for a slightly more elegant dinner to thank him for helping me move — to be honest it was mostly because I had just purchased a really cute dress and needed an excuse to wear it out — and I found myself looking out of town, but still fairly close by for a nice eatery.

After some research, I decided I would take him to Bentley’s Grill in Salem. The reviews looked promising, the menu had my mouth watering and the prices looked doable for a college student budget, while not being as cheap as some chain restaurants. We set our reservations for 7 p.m. on a Friday, a typically busy day, and they were still able to get us a nice table for exactly when we requested.

Once we arrived, we found the restaurant in an extravagant looking lobby in the Grand Hotel. Immediately, we were greeted and seated by smiling faces who gladly took our drink orders — we had many options as the location also had a full bar — and were given our menus.

I started by ordering their calamari with lemon roasted garlic aioli. My boyfriend isn’t a huge fan of seafood, but we both still very much enjoyed the appetizer which came out to us quickly. The serving size was perfect for a starter and it was fried perfectly.

Not too long after, we were brought our dinners. I ordered their Fulton New York cut steak with roasted garlic mashed potatoes and a vegetable side. My boyfriend ordered their special of the day, which was ribs with arugula, rice and a sun-dried tomato salad. My steak was cooked perfectly medium-rare, and his ribs were incredibly tender. Everything was cooked just as we had ordered it.

The waitress was checking up on us frequently, making sure everything was served to our liking. She was always incredibly kind and genuinely seemed as if she wanted to make the best experience for us as possible.

We finished our dinner by somehow making room in our incredibly full stomachs and ordering a crème brûlée dessert. This was probably my favorite part, as this is my absolute favorite sweet. My boyfriend didn’t love it quite as much, but he also had never had crème brûlée before and wasn’t sure what exactly to expect.

Overall, I thoroughly enjoyed the entire night. The service was top-notch, the food was all cooked to perfection, and the atmosphere and ambiance was both comforting and appealing. I’d definitely go here again if I’m looking for a more elegant dining experience.

 

Contact the author at chealy16@wou.edu

Finding time to be health conscious

Caity Healy | Lifestyle Editor

Caity Healy

Caity Healy | Lifestyle Editor

During this time of year, many people want to begin moving towards a healthier lifestyle. However, the new year also marks the beginning of a new term. As a result, finding the time to cook healthy meals for yourself can seem almost impossible. Luckily, using a slow cooker can make this task far more simple than it seems.

With most slow cooker recipes taking hours to complete, all you have to do is get it started, go about your day and finish whatever you need to do. Then, when you get back, you’ll have a meal prepared that’s ready to go for you, and it required about as much work as going out to eat. It’s also cheaper. So go find yourself a slow cooker and get started on these meals.

 

Vegan Black Bean Soup

Recipe from emelieeats.com

Drain and rinse six cups of black beans. In the slow cooker bowl, place the beans, 4 cups of vegetable broth, 1 finely chopped yellow onion, 1 finely chopped red bell pepper, 2 chopped jalapenos, 1 cup of salsa or tomatoes, 2 teaspoons of minced garlic, 1 tablespoon of chili powder, 2 teaspoons of ground cumin, 2 teaspoons of salt, 1 teaspoon of ground pepper, and ½ teaspoon of paprika. Cook on high for six hours, or until the beans are tender. Serve warm and top with avocado and cilantro. Feel free to omit or add any spices or ingredients that you would like.

 

Stuffed Peppers

Based on a recipe from delish.com

In a bowl, combine one pound of ground turkey with one can of drained black beans, 1 diced tomato, ½ cup of shredded cheese, 1 cup of cooked brown rice, 1 cup of corn, 1 teaspoon of cumin, 1 teaspoon of chili powder, ½ teaspoon of garlic powder and ½ teaspoon of oregano. Season with salt and pepper. Stuff 4 bell peppers with mixture, and place them in the slow cooker open side up. Cover and cook on high for 3 hours. Can be topped with avocado, cilantro, and sour cream.

 

Zucchini Lasagna

Recipe from primeverakitchen.com

In a bowl, mix 15 ounces of part-skim ricotta cheese, 1 egg, ¼ cup of parmesan cheese, and one cup of chopped spinach. Coat the inside of the slow cooker with cooking spray. Ladle one cup of tomato sauce on the bottom of the slow cooker. Layer 5 slices of zucchini on the bottom. Place some of the ricotta mixture on this, and top with a small amount of mozzarella cheese. Repeat this process until you’ve used all the slices from 4 medium zucchinis. Top with mozzarella and parmesan. Cover and cook on high for three and a half hours. Turn off the slow cooker and let sit for one hour unopened. Serve warm.

 

Contact the author at chealy16@mail.wou.edu

Conquering the New Year’s resolution drop-off

PFD

Caity Healy | Lifestyle Editor

We’re officially into the second week of the new year. In other words, we’re officially into the part of the year where people begin throwing their resolutions out the window and giving up on their goals entirely.

Like many, you probably started out strong. You kept up with your resolution every single day, and slowly you started allowing yourself to push all of it aside. If this sounds familiar, or you can feel yourself getting eerily close to this outcome, then it’s time to buckle down and focus on ways to stay consistent.

Your outcome often depends on the resolution you set in the first place. If you haven’t set one yet, it’s not too late. Refer to our online article titled “Setting the new year up for success” to learn what makes a proper resolution. However, if you already set one, and it follows all the guidelines of a realistic goal, then you can depend on the fact that with your willpower and determination, an ideal outcome will be reached.

First of all, to maintain your goal, you need to hold yourself accountable. Write down what you want to do and how often, and check it off as you go. Being able to put it in writing that you accomplished what you wanted to do will not only feel rewarding, but it will also be proof to yourself that you’re making progress and make it easier to track. You could even go as far as to put it in your planner. That way, it’s not something in the back of your mind, it’s an actual part of your daily schedule.

However, if you are someone who struggles with reaching goals on your own, you may want to consider looking to a friend. Having someone there to motivate you and keep you pushing will force you to work even harder at whatever your goal may be.

Second, review your resolution. Are you already failing in the second week? Perhaps the problem isn’t you; it may be that you simply set a resolution that is just impossible to reach. This is an easy fix. You can still reach the same goal in smaller increments. For example, if your goal was to workout five times a week, just cut it down to three. If that gets too easy, make it four, and then eventually five. You don’t have to meet your resolution all at once- time things out according to your own ability.

Third, if you’re comfortable enough, make it public. Tell your family, friends, or if you’re feeling courageous, even tell social media what your resolution is. Some people find it rewarding to be able to post updates on what they are doing. Also, you’ll have support from a large group of people who want to see you succeed.

Fourth, don’t let yourself give up. Say your goal was to eat healthy, and you chose fast food every day this year. So what? We all start somewhere. You slipped up, so forgive yourself and move on. Trust in yourself, and trust your determination, and you will start reaching your goal. Even if it’s a slow process, any progress is better than none.

 

Contact the author at chealy16@mail.wou.edu

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