This week in completely made up horoscopes

The Western Howl Staff

Theme: What are the signs favorite thing(s) about the Earth?

Aries 3/21-4/19  

Coca-Cola

Taurus 4/20-5/20

Whatever will get me the drunk the fastest.

Gemini 5/21-6/20 

Dog water

Cancer 6/21-7/22

Mimosa, hold the champagne

Leo 7/23-8/22

We will be SOBER hit em with a limeade

Virgo 8/23-9/22

Is straight Fireball a cocktail?

Libra 9/23-10/22

Vodka in a plastic water bottle

Scorpio 10/23-11/21 

rooster

Sagittarius 11/22-12/21

AMF AMF AMF AMF AMF AMF CHECK OUT OUR YOUTUBE VIDEO

Capricorn 12/22-1/19

Anything that i can add maraschino cherries to

Aquarius 1/20 – 2/18

Juice … just juice

Pisces 2/19 – 3/20

Love me a sex on the beach 😉