Mount Hood

A mildly erotic collection of poetry and short prose

Screen Shot 2016-01-08 at 4.07.43 PM

By: Katrina Penaflor 
Managing Editor

Where to begin? Well, to be honest, I’m not entirely sure, as I’ve never reviewed anentire book of poetry before. But I guess I’ll start with “Dirty Pretty Things” was very good. Fair start?

Now on to actual details, to let people know what in the world I read and why anyone else should care to read it.

The author of the collection is Michael Faudet. I first discovered Faudet’s writing on Tumblr while scrolling through my feed.

I had never read anything of his before and his poem “A Question for Anna” caught my attention. It was only one line long, so perhaps it still falls under the category of prose.

It read, “Do you know what a palindrome is Madam?”

I couldn’t decipher what it was about this line that caught my attention, but I think it had to do with how clever it was. Madam, obviously falling under an example of a palindrome, completing the cheeky joke.

From there I kept reading Faudet’s work on his blog and eventually received “Dirty Pretty Things” for Christmas.

Let’s start with the introduction, which was interesting and odd in all the best ways. Instead of a regular run of the mill insight on the work of the author, the intro talked about the book “The Little Prince” by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry.

The importance of this was to describe the significance of the story to Faudet and his girlfriend and poet Lang Leav, who wrote the introduction. I enjoyed this candid insight to the relationship of the two writers because it laid the groundwork for possible inspirations behind the fantastical and dream-like voice the author has.

A majority of the poetry and writing is quite short, sometimes two or three lines long and nothing over four pages.

The reoccurring theme of Faudet’s writing is the overwhelming array of emotions that occur when one falls in love.

From the initial sexual interest, to the heartbreaking realizations of loving someone who doesn’t love you back, “Dirty Pretty Things” gives an honest look into the mind of a male speaker who is completely enthralled by his female muse.

A strong point for me was Faudet’s daring attempt at expressing characters’ sexual encounters with one another. He wrote with such whimsy, that the eroticism of it all nearly came across as some kind of dream. With characters dancing from bed to bed with nothing to worry about but his or her pleasure.
The only downside to this was at times the overuse of the words “fu*king” and “panties,” and “sex” tended to drag the writing down, and left a tackiness to some of the later poems.

I wouldn’t say this book is for everyone, as it often teeters back and forth from erotic to tooth-achingly sweet. I also could have done without the clichéd rhyming that occasionally popped up, and a few of the poems were just too short for me to pull meaning from.

But if looking at the work as a whole, I think Faudet created a clever and unique look at modern love. I appreciated his portrayal of characters who didn’t shy away from their sexual desires, and weren’t afraid to openly cry tears of joy and pain.

In addition, the way the words on the page were displayed visually were quite beautiful. I would absolutely read Faudet’s writing in the future, and would be interested in reading Lang Leav’s as she has spoken of her writing being inspired by Faudet.

The force has awoken, a little too easily

By: Conner Williams 
Editor in Chief

ATTENTION: THIS ARTICLE CONTAINS SPOILERS, BUT SOME MAJOR PLOT POINTS HAVE BEEN INTENTIONALLY OMITTED

I’d like to start this review off by saying that I am a huge “Star Wars” fan; I bought my ticket to see “The Force Awakens” for the first showing available minutes after they went on sale. My friends and I arrived to the theater more than three hours early and hung out discussing our theories until the lights dimmed and our hearts began to race with anticipation.

I was utterly amazed. “The Force Awakens” was a roller coaster of emotions for me, filled with nostalgic moments and ones of sadness. I walked out of the theater in true awe, for one of my favorite series was back. I saw it again a second time days later, and loved it even more. But it wasn’t until the third time I saw it that I was able to put my crazed fanboy sense of pride aside and look at the movie for what it truly is.

Look, I liked the movie. The filmmakers used plenty of great props and costumes rather than CGI, which I thought was fantastic. It did a great job of providing viewers and long-time fans with plenty of nostalgic, emotional scenes that reminded us why we loved the series in the first place.

But that’s just the thing: I don’t need a reminder of why I love the series; I already know why I do. I wanted something new, something innovative, not the same plot with new characters and special effects.
And let’s be honest, things were way too easy for Rey. She goes from some nobody scavenger on a desert planet to one of the most powerful force users in the galaxy in a matter of hours (assuming the film’s plot occurs over the course of a day or two), pulling Jedi mind tricks without even knowing what they were beforehand, and beating a trained force-user in lightsaber combat (yes, I know he was injured, but I still find it hard to believe she got off without a scratch).

I also thought the film was a bit too comedic in some scenes that ought not to have been made funny. Kylo Ren gets informed of bad news and then throws a temper tantrum? All that does is make him seen less menacing. Now we have a laughable bad guy. The new droid (BB-8) served its purpose of comedic relief, but it seemed like there was just too much of it. “Star Wars” is traditionally lighthearted, but there are some aspects, like powerful force feats and all-powerful bad guys, that just should have been taken more seriously.

3 out of 4 paws.

Baker Street boys return

By: Conner Williams 
Editor in Chief

I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again: BBC’s “Sherlock” is one of the greatest television shows in history.

Each episode seems to be more cleverly written than the last, and this one takes the cake by a waterfall.

The long-anticipated special episode entitled “The Abominable Bride,” which fans were told is a standalone and is separate from the series, took us back to the origin of the adventures of Sherlock Holmes (Benedict Cumberbatch, “Star Trek: Into Darkness”) and John Watson (Martin Freeman, “The Hobbit”): Victorian-era London.

Complete with wonderful costumes and time-period props, the episode takes us back to the time when it all began, when Sir Arthur Conan Doyle conceived the brilliant crime-solving duo that has inspired countless detective narratives for more than 100 years.

The game is afoot as Holmes and Watson take on yet another seemingly incomprehensible case of murder and mystery. A woman dressed in a bride’s gown is spotted on a balcony shooting at multiple people before she turns the gun on herself. Then, hours later, she is reported by a police inspector to have murdered her husband in cold blood. How could she, whom had just committed suicide hours before, have killed this man?

Reluctantly sporting his trademark cap at the insistence of Watson’s words, “You’re Sherlock Holmes, wear the damn hat!” Holmes unravels the mystery thread by thread only to reveal that it isn’t what he thought it was; it’s something much greater, a resemblance to a case that has haunted him for years. No, Holmes must solve this case in order to solve another, a case that has baffled him and left his mind twisted from the day it happened.

I absolutely love the way that “Sherlock” episodes twist and turn all over the place, keeping me guessing as to where they are going next. This particular episode took me down a winding path that kept showing me what appeared to be the end of the road, but was actually yet another twist.

“Elementary, my dear Watson,” as Sherlock would so often tell his faithful companion as he tried to keep his bearings during the case. I felt similarly to Watson as I tried to keep up with the constant barrage of unexpected surprises this episode had in store.

The fourth season of “Sherlock” is, regrettably, tentatively scheduled to premiere sometime in the beginning of 2017.

If you missed “The Abominable Bride,” you can catch it again on Sunday, Jan. 10 at 7 p.m. on PBS, or you can stream it online at pbs.org/masterpiece beginning Jan. 11.
Did you miss me?

Space fights never felt so good

By: Declan Hertel
Entertainment Editor

This movie kind of transcends the need for a review. I guess the only reason you might want to read criticism is if you wanted to know if it goes the way of the much-maligned prequels.

Ladies and gentlemen, it does not.

“The Force Awakens” is really great.

The thing about the prequels is that George Lucas wanted to make “Star Wars” different. He wanted to move it beyond the lighthearted, action-packed, Saturday morning serial-inspired films that they were by introducing diplomacy and trade negotiations. While those things can be engaging and exciting (see: the “Star Trek” TV shows), they’re not Star Wars.

This is what is great about “The Force Awakens:” it is made by people who grew up with the original Star Wars, and they know what made it so near and dear to their hearts. The fact is, it doesn’t take itself or its world terribly seriously, and doesn’t try to be hard sci-fi or an adult political drama. It’s a story of ACTION and ADVENTURE in SPACE! It’s got massive spaceship dogfights! It’s got adorable robots! It’s got battles with SWORDS MADE OF LIGHT! It’s full of wisecracking, swashbuckling heroes! It’s fun! It’s space fantasy of the highest degree! The original trilogy was awesome then, and it is awesome now. THIS is why. THIS is what “The Force Awakens” remembers about Star Wars, and what it executes with perfection.

All the series newcomers turn in excellent performances. Daisy Ridley and John Boyega’s Rey and Finn are characters that I will follow anywhere through the galaxy. Adam Driver’s Kylo Ren is an intriguing new masked villain. Seeing the familiar faces of the original trilogy was a delight. I loved everything about this movie.

I would have said that this is a movie near exclusively for fans of the series, based on a great deal of humor coming from references to the previous films, but then a friend of mine who had never seen any Star Wars loved it. This is the sign of a good reboot. Totally enjoyable and accessible by newcomers to the franchise, but dripping with fanservice for those who have stuck with it all this time. I applaud all those involved with “The Force Awakens;” I think you did us longtime Star Wars fans proud, and created many, many new ones in the process.

Now, a franchise as big as Star Wars is going to have people going to the theatre, many of whom are longtime fans, who hate the movie before they walk in. At this point in its release, you, dear reader, have probably heard them espousing their bitter opinions. I would like to recommend that you don’t listen to those people and go see the movie for yourself. Maybe you’ll like it, maybe you won’t, but don’t let someone who hates movies tell you to hate this one.

But as for my verdict, “Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens” is really, really great. If you haven’t seen it already, ohmygod do it now.

Jessica Jones” hits hard on Netflix

By: Ashton Newton 
Staff Writer

Earlier this year, Marvel’s cinematic universe got a new hero with Netflix’s original “Daredevil,” which added to the world of the Avengers with a darker, adult tone.

On Nov. 20, the follow-up, “Jessica Jones,” was released on Netflix to add to the new street-wise line-up.

These shows are two of four planned, with “Luke Cage” and “Iron Fist” coming at a later date, that will ultimately lead to The Defenders being formed and getting their own show.

Jessica Jones (Krysten Ritter, “Breaking Bad”) is an alcoholic private investigator with super strength and the power to jump really high as she tracks down her enemy Kilgrave (David Tennant, “Doctor Who”), who has the terrifying power of mind control.

Along the way, Jessica gets help from some familiar Marvel faces including Luke Cage and her best friend, Patsy Walker.

I personally loved the show. I enjoyed seeing how the reality of the Marvel cinematic universe isn’t truly all Asgardian rainbows and Avengers towers, and how people with abilities leave devastation and pain behind.

It is definitely a dark show, aimed at adults, but I think as a comic fan, and a fan of superhero movies, it was an extremely rewarding watch.

One of the coolest factors of the show is that being on the streets of New York with this super powered character shows that the citizens in Marvel’s cinematic universe are beginning to open up and accept the fact that there are people with abilities among them.

I think this is especially important to show with characters like Spiderman, Doctor Strange, and Captain Marvel being introduced into the universe soon.

The trailer was also released last week for the next Captain America movie, “Civil War,” which will be released in May of 2016.

The movie shows how a new piece of legislation limiting the powers of the Avengers and other people with super hero abilities divides our protagonists into two opposing sides.

It will be interesting to see if the repercussions of the movie affect Marvel’s street-level heroes like Daredevil and Jessica Jones as well.

“Jessica Jones” and “Daredevil” are both streaming on Netflix now, with “Daredevil” season 2 and “Luke Cage” coming in 2016.

Unconventional Christmas movies

In Bruges
By Declan Hertel, Entertainment Editor

Two Irish hitmen are ordered to hide out in Bruges, Belgium after a job goes horribly wrong. This sounds like a terribly un-Christmas film, I know. But beyond the movie taking place during Christmas, it has several elements of the Nativity story in it: a couple can’t find a place to stay to see out the trial ahead of them and it centers around the fate of a young boy, to name two.
The pretty Christmas-y themes of redemption, forgiveness, and selflessness make up the fabric of the narrative, and as characters talk about the charming, beautiful Bruges being a “fairy tale town,” the film, which starts in absolute realism, becomes more and more like a fairy tale.
A fairy tale full of guns, blood, and about one profanity per sentence spoken, but a fairy tale nonetheless.
While it’s not “about” Christmas, Christmas is the foundation “In Bruges” is built on. It’s currently streaming on Netflix. Spike your nog and check it out.

Edward Scissorhands
By Darien Campo, Staff Writer

If you’re looking for an unconventional Christmas film to celebrate the holidays, look no further than the 1990 classic “Edward Scissorhands,” which is truly one of the oddest films I’ve ever seen.
The story revolves around a young man (Johnny Depp) constructed by an eccentric inventor (Vincent Price.) Before he can finish his creation, the inventor passes away and leaves the young man in an incomplete state — with a collection of scissors in place of his hands (don’t think about it too much).
The protagonist finds himself dragged into a bright, pastel-colored suburban paradise where everyone knows everyone else and rumors travel quickly. He finds it hard to fit into suburbia (what with the aforementioned scissors for hands) but manages to fall in love with a beautiful young woman (Winona Ryder). As the Christmas season approaches, tensions rise and Edward’s new life is threatened.
Tim Burton brings us a delightfully out of place character who’s fun to watch, and easy to relate to.
Edward has one of the biggest hearts in cinema, and is easy to love (even with scissors for hands).

Gremlins
By Stephanie Blair, Photo Editor

Nothing screams “the holidays” like a 1980s mom defending her kitchen against green-blooded demons, so if you’re into that kind of thing, go ahead and throw “Gremlins” in the VCR.
Set in Kingston Falls, U.S.A, “Gremlins” is the story of a kid named Billy trying to support his family while his eccentric father hacks it as an inventor. Billy works at the bank with Kate, a quiet, pretty girl he has a crush on.
There’s also an evil old lady with bad eyebrows; a crazy, racist neighbor; and Billy’s faithful, but mischievous dog, Barney.
It’s a cute family movie taking place just before Christmas. And then things get weird.
Billy’s father gives him a Mogwai, a little three-fingered, Furbie-looking creature that has three strict rules:
No bright lights- sunlight will kill him. Don’t get him wet. Never feed him after midnight.
After accidentally breaking the second two rules, Gremlins begin to wreak havoc on the town.
It’s the perfect holiday-family-horror film. Christmas spirit, young love, and murder by microwave; who could ask for more?

Board games for the holidays

By: Declan Hertel
 Entertainment Editor

Families often play games at Christmas, and they are often dull. I am here to save you from the holiday gaming blues with some great, inexpensive games to bring the family together.

“Gloom: Second Edition” – For telling all-new dark Christmas stories.

“Gloom” is a fun little card game with a Tim Burton/Edward Gorey feel, wherein you preside over a family of Victorian miscreants and deadbeats and make them as miserable as possible before sending them to the grave.

Most of the fun of the game is making up stories about exactly how Lord Wellington-Smythe came to be “Cursed by the Queen,” and then “Beaten by Beggars.”

If your family doesn’t have the dark and wicked sense of humor the game wants, try “Once Upon a Time,” which has similar storytelling bits, but in the vein of fairy tales. Both are $20.

“Forbidden Desert” – For uniting the family in perilous times.

Your airship has crashed while on an expedition! Rebuild it and escape before you’re swallowed up by the Forbidden Desert! This cooperative exploration game demands teamwork to recover the lost parts of your vessel.

Each character has a different set of abilities, and finding the best strategy to utilize them and get home safely is key to getting home, along with efficiently and quickly exploring the desert as the sandstorm rages on. No one gets left out because everyone has to help out.

With planning, patience, and a little luck, you just might make it out alive. $20 – $25.
“Bang!” – For when the figgy pudding hits the fan.

Tensions can run high around the holidays, and sometimes you just need a good old shootout to get back on track. “Bang!” is a card game that simulates the gun battles at high noon from old “spaghetti western” movies.

The Sheriff and his Deputies have got to eliminate all the Outlaws and the Renegade, the Outlaws need to kill all the lawmen, and the Renegade needs to be the last man standing.

The catch is: no one knows who’s who. Watch carefully and take notes, because when the lead starts flying you just might catch some!

If you’re looking for a simpler, cheaper shootout game, you can’t go wrong with “Poo,” wherein zoo monkeys fling poo at each other. It’s quick, dirty, and a lot of fun.

“Bang!” is $25, “Poo” is $10.

“The Good Dinosaur” review

By: Declan Hertel
Entertainment Editor

Pixar’s latest film, “The Good Dinosaur,” is a curious little piece. It’s quite a good little piece, but it is definitely curious.

It holds the distinction of being the second Pixar film this year; “Inside Out,” which was released in June, was great, but this is a first for Pixar, who has never released more than one film in a single year.

It’s clearly a “kids’ movie,” as opposed to a “great kid-friendly movie,” like the rest of Pixar’s repertoire. It’s an intriguing step for Pixar, especially as we look ahead to their faster release schedule for the coming years.

Firstly, let me say that “The Good Dinosaur” is jaw-droppingly gorgeous. The vibrant landscapes, the fluidity of movement, the detail on the characters, it’s all stunning.

I mentioned two weeks ago that “Toy Story” still looks really good 20 years later, and it does, but it looks like a B-grade student project next to “The Good Dinosaur.”

There’s hardly a frame in this movie that couldn’t stand on its own merit, visually speaking.

But this leads us to one of the curiosities: sometimes the movie comes off as experimental in animations that were strung together to create a movie.

This is reinforced by the episodic structure of the movie; it’s more of a series of islands than an A-to-B progression, highlighting that this might not have been a grand-concept picture from the get-go like “Finding Nemo” or “The Incredibles.”

This method of storytelling is not inherently a bad thing at all, and actually makes for an interesting feel for “The Good Dinosaur,” which is to say that it is is a “boy and his dog” story in the American South, but with dinosaurs.

This is weird, but ultimately really cool, and allows southern baritone Sam Elliott (the narrator in “The Big Lebowski”) to voice a giant T. Rex, which is just tops.

Elliot’s character, Butch, brings up another strange part of “The Good Dinosaur:” it couldn’t decide how grown-up it wanted to be.

It had all the goofy antics one would expect from a movie like this, but also features, among other moments, Butch telling a story about how he drowned a crocodile in its own blood.

There were several moments that could be genuinely unsettling to a small child, and several were unsettling to me (though the child two rows behind me seemed to thoroughly enjoy the movie).

It’s almost unfortunate that Pixar has such a great overall track record: we expect greatness from them now, so a film like “The Good Dinosaur” that is just “solid” will likely get overlooked. It’s definitely worth a watch, but it is especially worth your time if you’re a diehard Pixar fan like your faithful author.

It keeps that innovative spirit that Pixar is known for, yet features many “kid flick” clichés. It feels familiar, yet is a fundamentally different movie than they have ever released before. It’s greater than the sum of its parts, but in an odd way.

All I know for sure is that it’s immensely interesting. Watch it, and if you see me around, let’s talk about it.

“Toy Story” Turns 20

By: Declan Hertel 
Entertainment Editor

We all know you’ve got to grow old, but growing up is dumb and you shouldn’t do it.

One school of thought would be perturbed by finding out that “Toy Story,” Pixar Animation’s first feature-length film, turns 20 years old on Nov. 22. But I think that the upcoming anniversary is a perfect opportunity to rewatch it for the zillionth time, and revel once more in what is both one of the best pieces of animation in history, and an indelible part of this generation’s childhood.

A solid percentage of my childhood memorabilia is “Toy Story” related. I still have all my Woody and Buzz Lightyear dolls and action figures, and every year the first item I put on the Christmas tree is a Sheriff Woody ornament.

One of my best friends has Woody and Buzz shoes and a big poster of the alien toys on her bedroom wall, and I have met a great many people with similar stories. “Toy Story” is a big deal for a lot of people.

But why? Why does this tale of talking toys still resonate so deeply with the babies of the mid-nineties?

Maybe because we had it while our brains were in their earliest stages of development, and it is thus etched into them. Maybe because after all the amazing technological advancements of the past few years, “Toy Story” still looks freaking fantastic.

Both of those things apply, but I think it has endured for another reason, one that I talked about in regards to Smashing Pumpkins’ “Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness” some time ago: it speaks to you in different, powerful ways depending on/no matter how old you are.

As a child, I watched it with glee, and imagined my own toys coming to life and having adventures. During my adolescence, I watched it and saw memories of a simpler, more imaginative time. Now as a twenty-something, I watch it and appreciate how honest and heartfelt the movie is.

My parents watch it and appreciate that a piece of children’s entertainment is so sophisticated and enjoyable to adults (not to mention the “growing up” theme of the later installments: my mother and I both openly wept during “Toy Story 3”).

I will always welcome Toy Story’s anniversaries: it’s another excuse to see what else it holds for the new phase of my life I find myself in. And now I’m going to watch it again.

History, Hip Hop, and Hamilton.

By: Jenna Beresheim 
News Editor

As someone who has personally struggled with learning history my entire life, I am constantly craving a learning source that tricks me into learning about new topics.

My childhood consisted of mnemonics, Wishbone the dog, and hours of Schoolhouse Rock. I even faintly recall The Animaniacs doing a few shows on states and presidents.

Names, dates, and locations have always been something I had to fully submerge my brain for any hopes I would retain an ounce of that information.

I was always that student in class that hummed a song or had some weird mental recollection tool to pull out of my pocket when the scantrons came out.

That is exactly the preconditioning that led me to latch onto the idea of a Broadway Musical featuring our Founding Fathers performing rap battles in an all-American, rags-to-riches story.

“Hamilton” puts Alexander Hamilton in the spotlight as a young twenty-something on his way up in the blossoming American government.

Other key figures that come into play are Aaron Burr, George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, Marquis de Lafayette, King George, and many more. Look at that, proof that I’m already recalling all of these key political figures.

The musical boasts over 46 tracks broken into two separate acts.

Through those 46 songs, Hamilton’s life is re-lived and history is told in a fascinating, enchanting way. Important dates, locations, events, and people are all laced in so seamlessly so as to educate the listener subconsciously.

The songs themselves accurately represent their characters as well – George Washington speaks in polished prose, while Lafayette sports a thick French accent.

This gives the characters more depth, and creates a relatable connection for all of them, even the characters you love to hate.

“Hamilton” debuted in February this year, where it sold out. Broadway quickly swooped in to host the musical on Aug. 6 2015, with multiple critical acclaims following shortly afterward.

The off-Broadway productions have even scored many awards, such as the Drama Desk Award for Outstanding Musical, along with seven other Drama Desk Awards out of 14 total nominations.

It is even rumored that the Broadway production is in the running for a 2016 Tony Award.

If that doesn’t speak for the musical enough, then listen to this: the entire soundtrack is free to enjoy on Spotify. So try it out for yourself without the big Broadway box office prices.

Now that may not seem like much – it’s a play for a reason, obviously.

But I have never experienced a musical that so accurately portrayed entire scenes within just the music itself. While listening, you’re dropped into war scenes, cabinet meetings in the form of vicious rap battles, and even countdowns to duels between two foes beyond compromise.

While I would fully encourage anyone to see “Hamilton” in its intended format for full immersion, I can attest to an experience just as fulfilling through the soundtrack alone.

And if you’re like me, you won’t be able to stop talking about it – or listening to it, for that matter – until everyone around you also has it memorized whether they like it or not.

4 out of 4 Paws