This week in completely made up horoscopes

The Western Howl Staff

Theme: Costumes the signs would wear!

Aries 3/21-4/19  

Pillow.

Taurus 4/20-5/20

Triangle guard from Squid Game

Gemini 5/21-6/20 

Iconic gay couple. Both.

Cancer 6/21-7/22

Mojo Jojo from the Powerpuff Girls

Leo 7/23-8/22

Stormtrooper

Virgo 8/23-9/22

A wine mom, wine included

Libra 9/23-10/22

Either Beyoncé or an Ouija Board

Scorpio 10/23-11/21 

Mort from Madagascar

Sagittarius 11/22-12/21

A T-Rex with a reach extender — unstoppable

Capricorn 12/22-1/19

Sparkly shimmery vampire, complete with an open shirt

Aquarius 1/20 – 2/18

2002 “Dirrty” Christina Aguilara. Or just the chaps.

Pisces 2/19 – 3/20

Sexy bunny