From the humor section: Booze and reviews of “Mother!”

Compiled by The Western Howl 21+ staff

Halloween is just around the corner, and to get ourselves ready for all the horror, four 21+ staff members decided to sit down and write our absolute honest reviews of a psychological thriller we hadn’t seen before, “Mother!” (2017). And in order for it to be really honest, we had to be a little tipsy.

These reviews were only edited for clarity and appropriateness, so get ready to enjoy our super-tipsy and very sincere thoughts.This film deals with sensitive themes centered around religion, Christianity and the mistreatment of women. Remember that these reviews are the opinions of the reviewers and do not reflect the opinions of The Western Howl. 

Please remember to drink responsibly.

 

Caity:

Climat change is real, folks. And “Mother!” wants you to know it! So basically, this movie is about Jennifer Lawernece’s worst day ever. She has a house that she worked SO hard on, and her husband (who is trash) continually makes everything hard for her. He lets literally anyone into the home (as long as they worship him… hint hint) even if it makes life hard for her. 

So here’s the thing about this film; if you don’t know a lot about Christianity, you really won’t know much about the movie. I’m gonna be honest, I don’t know a ton, but like I kinda got my way through it enough to figure out what was happening. Like, there was a LOT of biblical references. But the whole time you pretty much just want to punch the husband in the face and want to give Jennifer Lawrence a hug. Poor Jenny. This shiz is rough for her.

Overall, I’d say what??? Was that??? And I don’t even think I would understand it IF I was sober. But I can fairly certainly say it was good. Also Kristen Wiig made an appearance and that made me :D!! 

So if you wanna watch it it’s on Hulu. It’ll make you feel bad about how you treat Mother Earth. Like, real bad.

 

Hannah:

Mother! A movie that makes my opinion a fact; religion has f—-d up this earth in a lot of ways and continues to. 

With Him being the “creator” using Mother (our Earth) until her death, just to start all over again in pure selfishness and greed. The creator (god, yes a lowercase g) just takes and takes to please his followers — the followers who only want their sins forgiven instead of facing reality b—-. The directors did an excellent way of portraying how messed up religion and it’s followers are to Mother Earth. Straws, created by religion to help destroy the poor turtles. Plastic bags, created by religion to clog the stomachs of animals. Apparently the Devil is bad and evil, but at least he created some sweet a– lettuce… Thanks for all the dank salad dude, you rock! 

 

Sage

I’m sad. Men should watch this movie. Women –watch at your own risk because it could trigger you a lot. I feel like being drunk isn’t a good thing for this movie – mostly because I feel like I can’t do the themes and social commentary justice. There are so many variables here regarding the symbolism. Basically, religion bad (sorry), women are always the ones who suffer (it’s true) and in the end, everybody is f—-d over because of it. AND IT NEVER F—–G CHANGES, Ya’ll don’t do S–T. Ya’ll, it aint that deep, but also it really is.

Anyways, this movie will give you a headache. You have to pay attention but the cinematography makes that difficult as the camera angles shift at every second. It will give you a headache. At first I was like, DANG THIS IS SOME GOOD WRITING. And at the end I was still DANG THIS IS SOME GOOD WRITING but with a side of, hmmm…I want to cut off the heads of the bougwazie (I KNOW THAT’S NOT HOW YOU SPELL IT) and you know that scene in Forrest Gump when Leuitenant Dan wants to fight god and hes screaming at the top of the mast…same? But less chaotic and more just…sad. Sadly fighting god. 

And that’s it, that’s the movie. Profiting off of women’s trauma. HMMMMMM. 

 

Rachel: 

(Managing Editor’s note: Rachel gave more of a play-by-play, so read simply for your enjoyment… and your confusion.)

kats seeing an older creepy man. Some tea? b—- he dont want no drink stop. shes making it anyways. 

Pregnant or pregnot? He didnt want nno tea but they gave it to him anywats, and he didnt watnt to stay the night but htey made him like d–n stop being so controlling. girls got hella linens. why all these old men with young girls? get yo wrinkles outta here. hes working on a new piece.she is unhappy in her marriage b—h leave him youre so young and pretty he is bad for you  get out of othat relationshio you can do so much better.

“Thought you might like some lemonade” *slams lemonade onto table and asks for pain pills* ?? what a b—-h. let this girl work on her wall damn. They goin on a “hike” 😉 ohh hes ‘a nature boy” 😉 oh no toilet broke . ewwwww its like a s–t squid. OMG IS IT THE BABY

?????????????????????????????????????????????????he is supposed to be god.  is she mother earth?? she givin birth now.  oh no. baby is gonre. She crying 🙁 they killed him. theyre eating the baby. good b—h you kill them go go go. WAit hes taking her to the beginning?? is this abotu god failing? Oh shes not her anymore. AHES THE CRYSTAL W T F  O MG . YOU GOTTA KNOW RELIGION FOR THIS MOVIE D–N.Read thr bible before you watch this

good night love tou ALL.