Dear Esmeralda,
One of my close friends may be “ghosting” me. She and I have known each other since middle school. We roomed together during our freshman year of college. I was the first person she came out to. I helped her move into her new apartment last summer.
Over winter and spring break we both went back to our hometown and I was excited that we could see each other. I had reached out to her on multiple occasions, but my texts usually go unanswered. When I do get a response, it’s typically, “Sorry! I’m just too swamped!” I know she made time to see another friend who ranks higher than I do in the “who to see” list. It still hurts.
Am I being too sensitive? Too self-centered? I’m worried that this is her way of breaking ties with me and I’m just not taking the hint. An outsider’s point of view would really help, even if it’s a harsh truth.
Sincerely,
Lost in Life
Dear Lost in Life,
Long lasting friends are always the hardest to lose. I get you there, friend. Deep breaths! Coming out to a friend is a big deal however, people do change (especially in college). Looking around at the people I know from high school (thankfully, I don’t know many of them now) and even the first year here at WOU! God! I came into college as a straight cis male! Look at the goddess that is me now!
Schedules are complicated and maybe the other friend’s schedule fit in better to hers? Maybe this is someone she’s interested in? Not sure how your friend identifies or the gender of their friend but that is a very good possibility that this person could be her boo-thang.
Personally I don’t think you are being too sensitive- no tea, no shade, no pink lemonade. I do think you’re going to have to realize that your friendship may be over with this person … I’m so very sorry for you dear. Sometimes even the closest friends grow apart. Hate to be the bearer of bad news, dear. I wish you the best!
All my best,
Esmeralda
