Mount Hood

Cheesy pick-up lines that DEFINITELY work 100% of the time…maybe.

You ever see a person that you just really want to impress, but the right words can’t seem to form in your brain? If that’s happened to you, you know that as a result, you end up standing there, blank-faced. Or, worse, you ramble an incoherent sentence that makes absolutely no sense. Fear not — your friends at the Western Howl are here to make those awkward encounters a little bit less uncomfortable. Just memorize a few of these cheesy pick-up lines, and you should be good to go.

Note: If something goes wrong while using these, it’s definitely NOT the fault of the Western Howl, or the fault of the pickup line. These lines are absolutely FOOLPROOF and if you get rejected or something then you probably did something wrong.

 

“Do you have an ugly boyfriend? No? Want one?”

“Hey, is that guy bothering you? No? Would you mind if I bothered you then?”

“You’re a 9/10. And I’m the 1 you need.”

“Girl, are you a Taco Bell sauce, cuz you’re pretty mild.”

“Are you a duck? Cuz you quack me up.”

“Are you a beaver? Cuz dam.”

“Are you a wolf? Cuz … cuz… (insert wolf noises).”

“I want to bang you just like how the RWEC’s automatic doors bang me.”

“Are you the main doors to the RWEC? Because you’re refusing to let me in.”

 

Compiled by the Western Howl staff

This week in completely made up horoscopes

[fruitful_tabs type=”accordion” width=”100%” fit=”false”]

[fruitful_tab title=”Aries 3/21-4/19″] Oddly satisfying: the way Gru from “Despicable Me” says “Gorls.” [/fruitful_tab]

[fruitful_tab title=”Taurus 4/20-5/20″] Four more weeks… [/fruitful_tab]

[fruitful_tab title=”Gemini 5/21-6/20″] I may have been born in the ‘90s, but my soul is from the Middle Ages (: <3 <3 [/fruitful_tab]

[fruitful_tab title=”Cancer 6/21-7/22″] When you just ate a carrot and you haven’t lost any weight yet, there is something wrong with the system! [/fruitful_tab]

[fruitful_tab title=”Leo 7/23-8/22″] Is it okay if I use this as this week’s horoscope? [/fruitful_tab]

[fruitful_tab title=”Virgo 8/23-9/22″] Oooh, the judge is gonna give you a life-sentence because you have been absolutely KILLING IT this week. [/fruitful_tab]

[fruitful_tab title=”Libra 9/23-10/22″] The stars think it was totally reasonable of you to be late to class because you stopped to pet the cat. [/fruitful_tab]

[fruitful_tab title=”Scorpio 10/23-11/21″] You’re wrong about the moon. [/fruitful_tab]

[fruitful_tab title=”Sagittarius 11/22-12/21″] Life is too short to spend it doubting yourself, Sagittarius. Remember that when you start to question why you’re rewatching “The Office” for the third time this year. [/fruitful_tab]

[fruitful_tab title=”Capricorn 12/22-1/19″] The stars see three full-size pizzas that will be consumed solely by you in your future. And by your future, we mean within the next week. [/fruitful_tab]

[fruitful_tab title=”Aquarius 1/20-2/18″] Fruit Loops are in your future, Aquarius. [/fruitful_tab]

[fruitful_tab title=”Pisces 2/19-3/20″] Best believe that the last time you saw your crush, you had some big old crusty nose gold visible — and boy did they notice! With that in mind, HAVE A GREAT WEEK! [/fruitful_tab]

[/fruitful_tabs]

 

BonnaWOU brings the beat back to Western

Caity Healy | Editor-in-Chief

The year was 1969. While everyone else was cooling off from the summer that would act as a pivotal moment for music and the core of the counterculture generation, Western, which was then known as the Oregon College of Education, was still heating up. Likely inspired by Woodstock’s three days of peace and music that took place just a month before, from the start of Fall Term, the Wolves were ready to keep the beat going.

A number of concerts took place within that academic year. Headlining at Homecoming was the Grass Roots. Between the years 1967 to 1972, the Grass Roots set a record by being on the Billboard charts for 307 straight weeks, according to their website, the-grassroots.com. At the time, the band was comprised of Creed Bratton — who is now known for his work as a character by the same name on “The Office,” Rick Coonce, Warren Entner and Rob Grill. In the late ‘60s and into the ‘70s, they released many hit singles, including “Midnight Confessions” and “Wait a Million Years.” This was the band that would kick off a series of concerts that would only be remembered by the yearbooks.

Also appearing in 1969 and the year following were bands such as “The Happenings,” which is known for their hit “See You in September,” and is also known for their member David Libert, who went on to manage artists such as The Runaways and Alice Cooper; Gary Lewis & the Playboys, which is known for their hit “The Diamond Ring,” and is also known due to their frontman, Gary Lewis, being the son of comedian Jerry Lewis; and, to top it off, was the Cowsills — a band comprised of all family members, who, according to their website, cowsill.com, were the inspiration behind “The Partridge Family.”

Exactly 50 years later, the year is 2019 — and Western is ready to bring the music back to campus. On May 23, Student Activities Board will be hosting “BonnaWOU,” a play on the annual Bonnaroo festival. Spearheaded by SAB member Helen Goodyear, the event was brought about for a specific reason.

“As far as anybody that I have talked to can remember, they don’t remember seeing a concert on campus. And I would love to bring that back,” Goodyear said. “I want to hit it with a bang … I want people to remember that this is a Western thing.”

To do this, Goodyear decided to look locally for some bands who might be interested. And in asking, what she found was that not only were these bands interested, they’ve been waiting.

“Every single one of them was like, ‘this is something that should’ve happened a long time ago,’” Goodyear added.

Although she had several options, Goodyear rounded her choices down to just three bands that she felt would best relate with the styles Western would enjoy: Jimmy Wolfson, The Ferenjis and Chromatic Colors. All of these are local bands, all have ties to Western and all were more than willing to help out. But aside from the fact that Goodyear knew students would enjoy these bands, she chose them for a few other reasons.

“I want to show (Western) that this is part of our identity as students. This is part of our identity as Oregonians. This is a part of us, and it’s a community that doesn’t get showcased that often. And I want to expose people to that and I want people to try something a little bit new,” Goodyear explained.

To make an event like this happen, there are a number of obstacles that Goodyear has had to cross — the largest being budget.

“When the budget was allocated at the beginning of the year, nobody was thinking that this was going to happen. And then I came in half way through year, and I was like, ‘Okay. We’re doing this,’” said Goodyear. Using only the small amount she was given, she was able to find “the cheapest options and the best quality options,” they could possibly get, as she explained. But due to her connections with the music department and those she knows, as well as her support from the rest of SAB, she was able to pull it off.

As for what students can expect, Goodyear was very transparent on her goals.

“I want people to be able to lay out on the grass, and bring hammocks,” Goodyear said, “If they feel they want to, I want them to be able to get up and dance. I want them to be able to enjoy the music however they want.”

The event is free to anyone interested in a night of music and relaxation. Running from 5-9 p.m., it will be located in the Grove. For any questions, contact Helen Goodyear at hgoodyear16@wou.edu.

 

Contact the author at howleditor@wou.edu

Photos courtesy of  WOU Archives

Guest Opinion: Save the birds, act now

[fruitful_alert type=”alert-info”]Disclaimer: The views and opinions expressed in guest opinions are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect the views of The Western Howl.[/fruitful_alert]

Kaylin LaClair | Guest Contributor

Let’s take a moment and put the politics aside. The fact is, we currently have a leader who is not prioritizing the environment and that is drastically having an impact on our world. When we know that we are negatively impacting the environment around us we must take that responsibility and hold ourselves accountable.

I regularly go to the gym every day and on this particular day, I walked upon a little olive green bird. I almost stepped on the little guy, but then it managed to skitter off and I paid no more attention to it. After about an hour at the gym, I left and walked outside to find this same bird on the ground dead. It had hit the window twice in such a short span of time. A young woman walked out, saw the bird and commented that there were two more on the ground just the day prior. Unfortunately, two men were walking by and threw the bird in the trash with no regard. When looking at the windows I saw a clear reflection of the sky, clouds, and trees in front of the parking meters. I can distinguish the reflection, however, the birds cannot and in the United States alone close to one billion birds die each year due to window collisions, according to abcbirds.org.

I contacted the gym personnel and informed them of what had happened and they agreed that action needed to be taken. One of the employees even followed up with me about a week later and said that there were two more casualties. It is heartbreaking to know that we are directly impacting our environment around us with such little regard and with this kind of issue, there is an easy and fast solution. I emailed the director and the response I received was on April 23 and was assured something would be done in the coming couple weeks.

For birds, they are unable to distinguish the reflections on the glass from reality. In order to remedy this, the reflections need to be broken up and this can be done a number of inexpensive and effective ways. Two methods that Western should be able to accomplish with ease is utilizing tape on the outside of the windows meant for birds, or use decals. Utilizing decals would be a great way for Western to advertise its clubs, its fitness center and community amenities. Western could use this as another selling point for prospective students by demonstrating that we care about our environment and our impact.

Every life in this world matters; it is important that we do the best we can to live in harmony with the other animals and species around us. Without them, the world we know would not be possible. It is incredibly important that we as humans take responsibility for the impacts that we have with our surrounding environment. If we know that we are directly having a negative  impact we need to act on that accordingly and swiftly.

 

To publish a response, contact the editor of The Western Howl at howleditor@wou.edu

Photo by Ashlynn Norton

Recognizing and dealing with burnout

Rebecca Meyers | Lifestyle Editor

College students are constantly working towards both new and old goals, some of which are personal and some of which are external pressures to be successful. It seems like there’s always post after post on social media about how constant hustle is the most important thing. Just the other day, I saw a tweet about how “rich people don’t sleep eight hours a day.” I also recently happened to come across a BuzzFeed article called “How millennials became the burnout generation.”

While a good chunk of the students at Western, particularly underclassmen, are Gen Z rather than millennials, the problems both generations face stem from similar sources and have been known to cause burnout.

According to psychologytoday.com, burnout is generally a combination of long hours, lack of control over the amount work one needs to get done and lack of work that a person finds meaningful. These are all common things that an average student faces on a regular basis. We often work long hours to pay for rent and tuition, we are assigned hours of work outside of class, we have other time commitments and we are usually required to take at least one class we have little to no interest in. Additionally, technology makes it so that work and school are able to contact us at any time, often putting us on edge even in our leisure time.

With these factors considered, I asked Craig Wimmer of the Student Health and Counseling Center how they are affecting Western students.

“I don’t think I would say burnout is common, but feeling overwhelmed and stressed is definitely a common experience, especially at the end of a term or the academic year,” Wimmer explained. “In a survey we did last spring of 2018, the National College Health Assessment, 93 percent of our students indicated that in the last 12 months they had ‘felt overwhelmed by all they had to do’. 89 percent indicated they ‘felt exhausted’ (not from physical activity).”

Unfortunately, burnout can result in “cynicism, depression and lethargy,” according to psychologytoday.com, which are the last things a college student needs to be able to focus on their goals. To counter burnout, it’s important to recognize when these symptoms start appearing. If they do appear, there’s a few ways of dealing with them. Wimmer noted some things to look out for are “Disengagement, lack of motivation, and isolation.”

If you feel these are problems you’re experiencing, Wimmer made something clear: “It’s not too late. Talk with professors, reach out to support services for academics and personal care,” he said.

Wimmer also had some advice for how to avoid burning out.

“Plan ahead. Look through your syllabi and map out when projects and tests occur and how you can spread out the workload … Find a strategy that works for you, whether that is a calendar, list, phone reminders.” Wimmer added, “Make sure that you are taking breaks, and dedicating some time for you to do things that you enjoy and are social.”

For mental health information and counseling services at Western, visit the Health and Counseling Center on campus or online at wou.edu/health.

 

Contact the author at howllifestyle@wou.edu

Photo by Ashlynn Norton

Tips for long distance relationships

Rebecca Meyers | Lifestyle Editor

As it turns out, some of that technology that our parents kept complaining made us antisocial can actually be used to be keep in contact with people in many new ways. One big example is long distance relationships, which tend to rely on methods of communication like texting and video chat. These still can’t quite make up for missing the real thing, however, and because of this many are skeptical when it comes to making long-distance work. The good news is that these relationships can work just fine as long as both people are committed to making it work. Stephanie Franco, a senior business major, is just one example of why this is true — she’s been in a long distance relationship for about five years. Her reason why come down to a few simple tips.

“You gotta put in the work, and you gotta communicate,” Franco said. Any relationship requires some work put in, but the distance adds a little extra. Even if you’re in the same time zone, coordinating the best time for face to face communication takes a bit more effort. Also, though it is constantly repeated in relationship advice, it’s still worth remembering that communication is important, even more so when it’s restricted.

“You have to be confident and trusting,” Franco added. One side effect of the skepticism surrounding long-term relationships is that people often feel like there’s pressure to make every communication or interaction count. The reality is that this is not necessarily the case for any other couple, so dropping these high expectations can have a relieving effect on partners who might feel they need to spend their limited time together a certain way. Embracing any quality time will ultimately strengthen the relationship.

Another main thing to keep in mind is to make sure you’re both on the same page about when, how and if you’re going to continue their lives together. Otherwise, someone might end up putting some of their life on hold in order to make things work out, only to find out they want different things. It’s important to still feel like your life is still progressing, or at least that there’s a plan you can depend on to make things work out in the end.

In the end, it’s up to each person to decide whether long-distance relationships are for them. Like any relationship, there’s a potential for it to end poorly, but there’s also great potential to be closer than ever thanks to having stuck it out together. As Franco pointed out, “If you’re both committed to making it happen, it will work out.”

 

Contact the author at howllifestyle@wou.edu

Photos by Ashlynn Norton

On campus to off campus

Karlene Curtin | Staff Writer

Finally — it’s time to have your own personal space that is finally not a dorm in the residence hall. That means lighting candles, a full kitchen, no strictly enforced quiet hours nor resident assistants. As exciting as it was to move into my first apartment, there were a couple things I wish I was more prepared for. Here are a few things I wish I had known when I moved into to my first apartment.

 

I missed campus dining

Trust me, this surprised me more than I expected. But with budgeting and going out adds up. Cooking becomes the alternative to save money. It is fun for a little bit, but on those days when the motivation to cook is just not there, taking a small trip to Valsetz Dining Hall seems to be the better alternative.

 

I didn’t realize how much furniture and kitchenware cost

Sometimes there are other alternatives to finding furniture, like posting an “SOS” to Facebook in hopes to score some free couches or even pots and pans. I suggest saving some money after every paycheck to put towards necessities.  

 

Budgeting is key

Food, gas, water, garbage, rent and school expenses add up and sometimes can feel impossible to budget out. I saved money by working extra hours and putting a portion of my paycheck into savings. Also by making smart purchases at the store instead of impulse buying can help save.

 

I have to deal with real adult problems with no third party

Turns out when the neighbors begin to get rowdy at 2 a.m., there’s no R.A. to tell the neighbors to cork it. And let’s be real — confrontation can be awkward. Maybe ask if they can give a heads up before they have another party.

 

Contact author at kcurtin14@mail.wou.edu

Photo by Ashlynn Norton

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