![\"Screen](\"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernjournal\/files\/2016\/05\/Screen-Shot-2016-05-09-at-4.14.23-PM.png\")
Aries 3\/21-4\/19\nI\u2019ve got a special treat for you this week, Aries. Orange mocha frappuccinos!<\/p>\n
Aries 3\/21-4\/19
\nI\u2019ve got a special treat for you this week, Aries. Orange mocha frappuccinos!<\/p>\n
Taurus 4\/20-5\/20
\nThere is a very adorable caterpillar in your pocket.<\/p>\n
Gemini 5\/21-6\/20
\nThe moons be dancin\u2019 and singin\u2019 in your favor, Gemini. You will not be hungover on May 14.<\/p>\n
Cancer 6\/21-7\/22
\nMy recommendation for you, Cancer, is to only buy Vlasic brand pickles from here on out.<\/p>\n
Leo 7\/23-8\/22
\nPiff the magic dragon.<\/p>\n
Virgo 8\/23-9\/22
\nYou think you\u2019re an Evian, Virgo, but you\u2019re really more like a Dasani or an off-brand generic bottle of water.<\/p>\n
Libra 9\/23-10\/22
\nLibra, the moon told me she burned her toast this morning and the char looked just like your face.<\/p>\n
Scorpio 10\/23-11\/21
\nYou will be attacked by a garbage squirrel in front of the WUC. Totally unavoidable.<\/p>\n
Sagittarius 11\/22-12\/21
\nThis content is currently unavailable in your country.<\/p>\n
Capricorn 12\/22-1\/19
\nA falcon will fly into your window at 5 p.m. this Sunday. Her name is Emma and she will be glorious.<\/p>\n
Aquarius 1\/20-2\/18
\nAll Aquarians remind me of my uncle Rodger. Cool guy.<\/p>\n
Pisces 2\/19-3\/20
\nIt was Vanessa Hudgens. She did it.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Aries 3\/21-4\/19 I\u2019ve got a special treat for you this week, Aries. Orange mocha frappuccinos! Taurus 4\/20-5\/20 There is a very adorable caterpillar in your pocket. Gemini 5\/21-6\/20 The moons be dancin\u2019 and singin\u2019 in your favor, Gemini. You will not be hungover on May 14. Cancer 6\/21-7\/22 My recommendation for you, Cancer, is to […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":825,"featured_media":3787,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","_lmt_disableupdate":"","_lmt_disable":"","_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","footnotes":"","_links_to":"","_links_to_target":""},"categories":[25],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3749","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-humor"],"modified_by":null,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3749","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/825"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3749"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3749\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/3787"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3749"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3749"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3749"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}