{"id":25329,"date":"2026-02-04T16:22:15","date_gmt":"2026-02-05T00:22:15","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/?p=25329"},"modified":"2026-04-14T16:26:58","modified_gmt":"2026-04-15T00:26:58","slug":"this-week-in-entirely-made-up-horoscopes-23","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/this-week-in-entirely-made-up-horoscopes-23\/","title":{"rendered":"This week in entirely made up horoscopes\u2026."},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Feb. 4, 2026 | The signs as Super Bowl Performances<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Aries: The nightmare blunt rotation of Janet Jackson, P. Diddy, Nelly, Kid Rock, Justin Timberlake and Jessica Simpson<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Taurus: Fergie singing the National Anthem the entire time<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Gemini: snoop dogg hogging all the weed<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Cancer: The Weeknd covid-19 performance\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Leo: Rihanna and her ASL interpreter\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Virgo: Trisha Paytas performing her iconic King Tut Tiktok<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Libra: Coldplay, Beyonc\u00e9, and Bruno Mars, but specifically Coldplay with the marching band<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Scorpio: Maroon 5, when Adam Levine ripped his shirt off<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Sagittarius: <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Shakira, Jennifer Lopez, Bad Bunny, J Balvin &amp; Emme Muniz in 2020<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Capricorn: Katy Perry and her nip slip<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Aquarius: ICP (there will be uncomfortable old people)<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Pisces: Kendrick Lamar, SZA and DJ Mustard. Specifically during the opening song (which is still unreleased by the way) \u201cman at the garden\u201d and \u201cpeekaboo\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Feb. 4, 2026 | The signs as Super Bowl Performances Aries: The nightmare blunt rotation of Janet Jackson, P. Diddy, Nelly, Kid Rock, Justin Timberlake and Jessica Simpson Taurus: Fergie singing the National Anthem the entire time Gemini: snoop dogg hogging all the weed Cancer: The Weeknd covid-19 performance\u00a0 Leo: Rihanna and her ASL interpreter\u00a0 [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1645,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"none","_seopress_titles_title":"This week in entirely made up horoscopes\u2026.","_seopress_titles_desc":"Feb. 4, 2026 | The signs as Super Bowl Performances","_seopress_robots_index":"","_lmt_disableupdate":"","_lmt_disable":"","_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","footnotes":"","_links_to":"","_links_to_target":""},"categories":[25],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-25329","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-humor"],"modified_by":"saragerrick","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/25329","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1645"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=25329"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/25329\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":25332,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/25329\/revisions\/25332"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=25329"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=25329"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=25329"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}