{"id":18013,"date":"2021-09-28T19:32:06","date_gmt":"2021-09-29T03:32:06","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/?p=18013"},"modified":"2021-09-28T19:32:07","modified_gmt":"2021-09-29T03:32:07","slug":"this-week-in-completely-made-up-horoscopes-63","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/this-week-in-completely-made-up-horoscopes-63\/","title":{"rendered":"This week in completely made up horoscopes"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

The Western Howl Staff<\/strong><\/p>\n

Theme: Giving advice to new students!<\/p>\n

Aries 3\/21-4\/19  <\/span><\/p>\n

\n

Drop out.<\/span><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Taurus 4\/20-5\/20<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

Pedialyte. Lots of pedialyte. Hydration station.  <\/span><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Gemini 5\/21-6\/20 <\/span><\/p>\n

Use last year’s essays.<\/span><\/blockquote>\n

Cancer 6\/21-7\/22<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

Go to community college first\u2014oh wait<\/span><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Leo 7\/23-8\/22<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

Join clubs, go to social events, make connections with professors, get an internship, get a job. All at once. You totally will not burn out extremely trying to please everyone. <\/span><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Virgo 8\/23-9\/22<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

Coffee is your best friend. Literally, you\u2019re not gonna survive without her. <\/span><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Libra 9\/23-10\/22<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

Befriend people. Many people. Date everyone you meet.<\/span><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Scorpio 10\/23-11\/21 <\/span><\/p>\n

\n

C’s get degrees. …or is it D’s, idk<\/span><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Sagittarius 11\/22-12\/21<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

College is more about the experience<\/i> than actual learning. Skipping classes is totally fine as long as you’re out living life to the fullest. <\/span>
<\/span><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Capricorn 12\/22-1\/19<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

Start budgeting, you\u2019ll probably have to survive a couple months with only $13 dollars at least twice.<\/span><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Aquarius 1\/20 – 2\/18<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

Summer is over. Accept it and embrace Fall so you can enjoy it!<\/span><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Pisces 2\/19 – 3\/20<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

Get some food in your stomach before\/while drinking so you can drink more<\/span><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The Western Howl Staff<\/p>\n

Theme: Giving advice to new students!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1094,"featured_media":18014,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","_lmt_disableupdate":"","_lmt_disable":"","_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","footnotes":"","_links_to":"","_links_to_target":""},"categories":[25],"tags":[176,175],"class_list":["post-18013","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-humor","tag-horoscopes","tag-humor"],"modified_by":"The Western Howl","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18013","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1094"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=18013"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18013\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/18014"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=18013"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=18013"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=18013"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}