{"id":17894,"date":"2021-05-24T00:03:52","date_gmt":"2021-05-24T08:03:52","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/?p=17894"},"modified":"2026-04-14T19:05:59","modified_gmt":"2026-04-15T03:05:59","slug":"this-week-in-completely-made-up-horoscopes-60","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/this-week-in-completely-made-up-horoscopes-60\/","title":{"rendered":"This week in completely made up horoscopes"},"content":{"rendered":"\r\n

\"\"<\/p>\r\n

The Western Howl Staff<\/strong><\/p>\r\n

Theme: Hot girl summer tips!<\/p>\r\n

Aries 3\/21-4\/19\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\r\n

\r\n

ur hot already<\/p>\r\n<\/blockquote>\r\n

Taurus 4\/20-5\/20<\/p>\r\n

\r\n

Sleep. Nothing else.<\/p>\r\n<\/blockquote>\r\n

Gemini 5\/21-6\/20\u00a0<\/p>\r\n

Disagreeing with Virgo, avoid the sunscreen and get toasty<\/blockquote>\r\n

Cancer 6\/21-7\/22<\/p>\r\n

\r\n

Live life to the fullest and don\u2019t be afraid<\/p>\r\n<\/blockquote>\r\n

Leo 7\/23-8\/22<\/p>\r\n

\r\n

Your fire\u2019s a little low babe, it\u2019s time you take it back<\/p>\r\n<\/blockquote>\r\n

Virgo 8\/23-9\/22<\/p>\r\n

\r\n

Wear sunscreen with at least SPF 30!<\/p>\r\n<\/blockquote>\r\n

Libra 9\/23-10\/22<\/p>\r\n

\r\n

GTL; Gym, tan, laundry! #jerseyshore\u00a0<\/p>\r\n<\/blockquote>\r\n

Scorpio 10\/23-11\/21\u00a0<\/p>\r\n

\r\n

be queer invoke fear<\/p>\r\n<\/blockquote>\r\n

Sagittarius 11\/22-12\/21<\/p>\r\n

\r\n

hydrate<\/p>\r\n<\/blockquote>\r\n

Capricorn 12\/22-1\/19<\/p>\r\n

\r\n

Cry twice a day, it\u2019ll clear your skin up to make for some killer photos<\/p>\r\n<\/blockquote>\r\n

Aquarius 1\/20 – 2\/18<\/p>\r\n

\r\n

Act \u201ccultured\u201d and order a \u201cBan(h) Mi\u201d that\u2019s actually just a chicken sandwich<\/p>\r\n<\/blockquote>\r\n

Pisces 2\/19 – 3\/20<\/p>\r\n

\r\n

Turn up the heater?<\/p>\r\n<\/blockquote>\r\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The Western Howl Staff<\/p>\n

Theme: Hot girl summer tips!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1094,"featured_media":17812,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"none","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","_lmt_disableupdate":"no","_lmt_disable":"","_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","footnotes":"","_links_to":"","_links_to_target":""},"categories":[25],"tags":[176,175],"class_list":["post-17894","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-humor","tag-horoscopes","tag-humor"],"modified_by":"saragerrick","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17894","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1094"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=17894"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17894\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":25458,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17894\/revisions\/25458"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/17812"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=17894"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=17894"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=17894"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}