{"id":16500,"date":"2020-11-03T19:59:45","date_gmt":"2020-11-04T03:59:45","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/?p=16500"},"modified":"2020-12-03T21:25:44","modified_gmt":"2020-12-04T05:25:44","slug":"this-week-in-completely-made-up-horoscopes-38","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/this-week-in-completely-made-up-horoscopes-38\/","title":{"rendered":"This week in completely made up horoscopes"},"content":{"rendered":"\r\n

\"\"<\/p>\r\n

The Western Howl Staff<\/strong><\/p>\r\n

Theme: Voting<\/p>\r\n

 <\/p>\r\n

Aries 3\/21-4\/19\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\r\n

Don\u2019t want to hear you whining if you didn\u2019t vote.<\/span><\/p>\r\n

 <\/p>\r\n

Taurus 4\/20-5\/20<\/span><\/p>\r\n

Are you ready to see another old white man as president again?\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\r\n

 <\/p>\r\n

Gemini 5\/21-6\/20\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\r\n

no you can\u2019t split your vote like your personality<\/span><\/p>\r\n

 <\/p>\r\n

Cancer 6\/21-7\/22<\/span><\/p>\r\n

Hold onto your butts.<\/span><\/p>\r\n

 <\/p>\r\n

Leo 7\/23-8\/22<\/span><\/p>\r\n

Just buy a few houseplants to like, help the vibe out, you know?\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\r\n

 <\/p>\r\n

Virgo 8\/23-9\/22<\/span><\/p>\r\n

Don\u2019t worry, next week\u2019s issue will include destressing tips.<\/span><\/p>\r\n

 <\/p>\r\n

Libra 9\/23-10\/22<\/span><\/p>\r\n

Wait, I was asleep. What happened?\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\r\n

 <\/p>\r\n

Scorpio 10\/23-11\/21\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\r\n

If you didn\u2019t vote, I hope you enjoy eternal darkness \ud83d\ude42<\/span><\/p>\r\n

 <\/p>\r\n

Sagittarius 11\/22-12\/21<\/span><\/p>\r\n

No matter what happens, we have each other \u2014 stay strong!<\/span><\/p>\r\n

 <\/p>\r\n

Capricorn 12\/22-1\/19<\/span><\/p>\r\n

Ah, the elderly man contest, the most interesting time of year<\/span><\/p>\r\n

 <\/p>\r\n

Aquarius 1\/20 – 2\/18<\/span><\/p>\r\n

By mail or booth, you best vote<\/span><\/p>\r\n

 <\/p>\r\n

Pisces 2\/19 – 3\/20<\/span><\/p>\r\n

Vote, or else\u2026 <\/span><\/p>\r\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The Western Howl Staff<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1094,"featured_media":16220,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","_lmt_disableupdate":"","_lmt_disable":"","_et_pb_use_builder":"off","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","footnotes":"","_links_to":"","_links_to_target":""},"categories":[25],"tags":[176,175],"class_list":["post-16500","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-humor","tag-horoscopes","tag-humor"],"modified_by":"The Western Howl","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16500","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1094"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=16500"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16500\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/16220"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=16500"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=16500"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=16500"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}